Top Ten Ways to Hide Your Phone From Your Teacher

Updated on February 13, 2015
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gmarquardt has an M.A. in history and German from SWTSU and has over 25 years teaching experience at public high schools.

Those rotten teachers are at it again. Being the completely preposterous windbags that they are, they are now demanding that you put your phone away during class and learn something. No matter how many times you explain to your teacher that your phone has been ruled a basic human right by the Hague Court, those idiotic teachers keep confiscating it! What's up with that? Look, we all know that teachers are terrible people who have no lives and simply want to ruin your day. They get off on it; it’s pretty obvious, isn’t it? Why else would they constantly bug you about taking off your hat, getting to class on time, completing your homework, bringing your materials, dressing appropriately and constantly rambling on and on about "a future?" Yawnsville! But what really takes the cake are all these conservative downers constantly yelling at you to put away your I-phone. They don’t understand that you have to post those pictures, update your status, pin, tweet about a fight or bully that little jerk Dave. What a bunch of morons.

Have you ever texted in class?

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However, perhaps the problem is that you just aren’t good enough at hiding your phone while in the classroom. So here are the top ten methods to hide your phone from those annoying teachers.

10. The Sleeve

Text in your hoody sleeve. This is an easy one, and you’re probably quite good at it by now, but just in case, here’s how it works. Just cross your arms on your desk, and pretend you are tired. You probably don’t even have to pretend! Lay your head down and slip your phone up into the sleeve, against your arm. Now you can feel for the vibrations when you get a text and when the teacher isn’t looking, just push up the sleeve a little and quickly text back. That’s all there is to it.

09. Body Block

Text behind a buddy. If you’ve got a big friend, use him for more than just protection. Use that big guy’s massive frame to block your teacher’s line of sight. Have a pre-arranged signal so that when you need a little privacy, he takes a big breath, blows up his chest and stretches. The more muscles he flexes and the larger he gets will keep any snooping teacher from catching you. By the time your teacher waddles up to your desk, that bulky boy has already kept them from seeing you slip your phone back in your pocket. Done and done!

08. In The Dark

Text in your purse or bookbag. This is a classic, and every good phone user knows it. Just keep your purse or backpack on your desk, the open end toward you. You can rest your phone on a book, a compact or your lipstick and continue to read your texts the entire time your teacher is droning on about something or another. Anytime a teacher calls you out on it, all you have to do is pull out that book, some lipstick or some hygienic product. That will stop them dead in their tracks. It’s technically lying, but who cares, your best friend Suzie just got a date to prom and you had to know! Not one single thing in this class is more important than that!

07. The Fake Read

Text behind your book. That’s right. Just prop open your book anytime you have independent reading and update that facebook status. Your teacher’s generation used to hide comic books in their textbooks, so why can’t you deploy the same methods? By the way, the bigger the book the better, as a larger book can help hide your hand movements. Unfortunately, you still need those thumbs of yours to text, and teachers can recognize that twitchy movement from a mile away. But hey, nothing is more important than learning what KanyeKim just tweeted!

06. In The Hat

This method is great when you have to do some work. Similar to texting while your phone is in your backpack or a purse, this one is much more subtle because your hat creates a smaller, less noticeable diversion. Simply leave your had upside down on your desk and just place your phone at the bottom of your hat. No one will be the wiser. It will appear as if you are listening to the teacher or working, but you'll be ready for that all important reply to that rant you made about that dude who looked at your girl. O no he won't!

05. At Arm's Length

Text at your side. This is widely used, so most teachers know of it, but it’s the best one for checking a facebook status because you can see your screen the clearest. You have to practice, however, as your look often gives it away. That stretched face and squinting eye is not only alarming and ugly, but it’s a major giveaway. Be smooth, whip out that phone and take a quick look and slip it right back into your pocket. Nobody saw a thing ... smoooooth!

04. Body Parts

Text in your lap with one leg crossed. Simply cross one leg under your desk and put the phone on your lap, away from the ole bore. You’ve got two built in advantages here; a shelf to hold your phone by itself and a wall to block a view. Moreover, because your hands are free most of the time, the teacher never even sees it. Pretty slick, Rick!

03. Who Cares?

Text right out in the open. This one works relatively well, actually. Just adopt the right attitude, angry yet nonchalant, moody and defiant. Don’t hide it, just stick that phone out right on your desk and start texting, disregarding everything that is going on around you. When your teacher looks your way, bounce your head around a little bit and start a slight sneer with a slightly trembling quiver in your upper lip. If your teacher actually has the gall to say anything, just glare at her and put your phone away. Don’t show any other emotion than complete hatred. That should stop them directly! Jerk.

02. The (Not-So) Obvious

Text under the desk. It's a little beneath your dignity, but hey, the "ole classic" works, especially in a crowded classroom setting. Just pull that bad boy out, slip it under your desk and text your girlfriend about tonight’s date, and quickly put it away. You're done, the text was sent, and your teacher is oblivious. L. O. L.

01. The Decoy

Text using two phones. This is the plan when you realize your teachers are just too old and slow. If, for some silly reason, you fail to employ any of the above nine methods and are silly enough to get caught, just slip that good phone into your pocket. When old grumpy pants who has no life demands you give up your phone, slip him that old one that doesn’t even work anymore. He’s too dumb to realize what you did and you can go right back to texting Marcus about how ugly Suzanne is. Classy!

Have you ever been caught texting in class?

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But of course, if you get caught, you have to have a quick excuse. Teachers are too busy as it is, so if you can make up a good excuse, you'll probably be able to keep your phone for another day. Here are the top ten excuses to employ when you get caught with your phones. Feel free to employ any of them; they all work perfectly fine. After using any one of these excuses, only crazy teachers who are obviously out to get you would take up your phone. And if that's the case, it wouldn't matter anyway what the super important, life altering, emergency reason was why you had your phone out!

Top Ten Excuses When Caught Texting

10. (Point at the clock on the wall and say): "I’m just checking the time. I don’t know how to read one of those clocks."

09. "I forgot my lunch and I was just texting my Dad to bring me something."

08. "I was checking on my missing assignments on Gradespeed ... from your class!"

07. "I’m not texting! I’m playing a game."

06. "My Dad wants to know when to pick me up from school. You want me to leave, right?"

05. "My best friend is crying because her boyfriend just broke up with her ... again."

04. "I need a ride home, and I have to ask my friend."

03. "I’m just using the calculator."

02. "Class hasn’t even started yet. Dang, dude!"

01. "My Mom just texted me."


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    • profile image

      Offensive 4 days ago

      This blog is offensive. "Teacher have no lives" anyone with a parent as a teacher would be offended. You're saying that as if you're mocking them and that includes me.

    • profile image

      Luke 3 weeks ago

      Last year i used the excuse “my mum texted me” and then the teacher called my mum and told her not to text me while I’m in class

    • profile image

      Layla 4 weeks ago

      This might help me

    • profile image

      Hi 4 weeks ago

      I already knew some of these but they are good too even the excuses.

    • profile image

      Danny 2 months ago

      how the hell do i get my phone back from the teacher

    • profile image

      M8Kidd 2 months ago

      I did the sleeve like all of my first 3 periods... Great methods.

    • profile image

      myaa 2 months ago

      nvm it worked

    • profile image

      myaa 3 months ago

      bruh my math teacher took mines today ughhh

    • profile image

      Jay 4 months ago

      I just use it

    • profile image

      Kristin 4 months ago

      I always get my phone taken away and half of the time I did not even do nothing wrong

    • profile image

      Michelld 4 months ago

      Those excuses aren't really gonna help considering my teacher has the strictest no phone policy and goes through the phone when she catches you

    • profile image

      lame website 5 months ago

      i just hide it clearly and dont use it in class you naughty kids

    • profile image

      Christopher 6 months ago

      Here's what you do if you don't want your teachers to even know you have a phone for you people in private school. You slip it in a bra or underwear. If they dare even try to look in there/tell you to take your phone you can report them for sexual harassment.

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      Marissa 8 months ago

      For the girls ,I sneak it into school in my bra then I get on it when the teacher leaves and in the bathroom,it might seem strange or useless but I've been doing it for several months now and still haven't been caught

    • profile image

      Awesome 9 months ago

      Ha! The fake phone one Nadilia said.... that was good.

    • profile image

      Sugra 11 months ago

      I study in a private school. If our teachers get to know they will not give our mobile in a day they will keep it for 1 to 2 weeks. But also I can't stop taking my phone to school

    • profile image

      Nadalia 12 months ago

      Thanks! Mr.Brauer thinks he got my phone, he has my fake one! :))))

    • profile image

      14 months ago

      If we get caught with our phones they get took away for a week ;-;

    • profile image

      Molly 14 months ago

      There all right

      In my school we have a time table wich shows what ur next lesson is and I just set a pic off the time table as my lock screen and when they look over I just say I'm checking what my next lesson is they normally just say well don't be we are doing work or print it off in future but never take my phone off me.

    • profile image

      Stephanie 15 months ago

      Well I am in a private school and they search our bags or body and ....... imagine how rude just imagine pray for us and I am taking my phone everyday and I won't stop

    • profile image

      Aria 16 months ago

      I don't think that the teacher would believe you if you've said you didn't know how to work a clock... that's something you learn in 1st grade.

    • profile image

      Nina 17 months ago

      I would just say i don't know how to use a clock like the one in the room if my teacher caught me texting

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      Mr. Man 18 months ago

      "I'm playing a game."

      Playing a game isn't allowed either. Not in my school, at least

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 3 years ago from USA

      I especially like those excuses. I'm keeping this one away from my high schooler. She and her friends don't need any more ideas!