Book Review: Love Warrior by Glennon Doyle

Updated on October 10, 2018
Holley Hyler profile image

Holley Hyler is an IT consultant and freelance writer and has been published Adelaide, Anti-Heroin Chic, Buck Off, and several others.

A Lesson in Self-Love

Love Warrior by Glennon Doyle is a powerful memoir. What makes it so powerful? For me, that would be Doyle's honesty and vulnerability. We can learn valuable lessons by reading another's story. Love Warrior was a beautifully written, honest lesson in self-love, on showing up for yourself first and fully so that you can be received by others in a similar sense. My story and Doyle's are very different, as I am sure yours will be, but no matter what your background is, you will take something away from this book. It could be something that helps you put into words and convey your own truth. And what happens when you can articulate this truth to others?

Magic. Or, at the very least, that is what I call it when you are in such a state of self-love and alignment that you become magnetic to all other types of love. Things fall into place, as if by magic. Doyle uses her personal example of how getting into alignment with herself transformed her relationship with her husband.

Some of the topics that are presented in Doyle's memoir are:

  • self-love and what that looked like for the author
  • eating disorders and body image
  • religion
  • alcoholism and addictions
  • infidelity
  • and an even deeper, spiritual explanation of all the above

Read on for highlights of my favorite parts and a link to buy the book.

In the book, Doyle goes into detail about her struggles with bulimia and how she went from that to treating her body with love and respect. Yoga was a big part of this.
In the book, Doyle goes into detail about her struggles with bulimia and how she went from that to treating her body with love and respect. Yoga was a big part of this. | Source

The Representative vs. The Authentic Self

One of the things I love most about Doyle's writing is that she puts into words very complex and difficult feelings, ones that are difficult to talk about so openly and honestly. A lot of people feel these things, but not many are willing to talk about them. And this in itself is one of the ideas she touches upon in her writing - how we send our representatives, and not our real selves, out into the world to converse with people. We send our representatives forth when we are not okay at all but just really need to make something work. An everyday example could be the cashier at the supermarket saying, "Hello, how are you?" in a rote manner, because this is how they've been trained - to have the same conversation with every single person who comes through their line. No matter what. Our representative is not our authentic self. It is just a hologram of us that goes through the motions.

As described in the beginning of the book, to be "big" in the world, to take up too much space, is to be real: a real, passionate, feeling, messy human that is not always capable of sending forth their representative. One of the things Doyle said earlier in the story, that I related to, was, "My love is so overwhelming and terrifying and uncomfortable and complicated that I need to hide from it. Life and love simply ask too much of me. Everything hurts. I don't know how people can just let it all hurt so much."

We do what we must to deal with this being "too big," with hurting so much. With seeing and feeling so much. We do what we can to numb all that hurt so that we can send our representatives out and seem normal. And this is part of a much bigger problem in the world - loneliness. Loneliness that stems from not being seen, and from self-abandonment.

Toward the end of the book, Doyle gives a heartwarming explanation of what it means to be "sexy" to her daughters. Hint: her explanation does not involve caked-on makeup or lingerie.
Toward the end of the book, Doyle gives a heartwarming explanation of what it means to be "sexy" to her daughters. Hint: her explanation does not involve caked-on makeup or lingerie. | Source

Constantly Yearning for Reunion

Another of my favorite points that Doyle makes is that we are all humans just longing for spiritual reunion. Maybe we express this longing in a variety of ways - through sex/porn addictions, alcohol, drugs, eating disorders, and the list goes on. "We are all desperate for reunion and we are trying to find it in all the wrong places," Doyle writes. "We use bodies and drugs and food to try to end our loneliness, because we don't understand that we're lonely down here because we are supposed to be lonely. Because we're in pieces. To be human is to be incomplete and constantly yearning for reunion."

Reunion with what, one may ask? Maybe with God, or Source, or Heaven, or whatever perfect ending you might imagine when a loved one passes. We've often heard, "They're in a better place now." We imagine it is a place where they feel whole in a way that they couldn't when they were inhabiting a human form. (At least, I imagine that.)

This way of thinking about our flaws as a longing for reunion is compassionate and full of forgiveness. This way of thinking about it helped me in considering and dealing with some of my own hang-ups. Sure, maybe we do not all exactly know what or who we are trying to reunite with, but there is always some higher intention hidden behind something dark, like an addiction to alcohol or porn. We always want to be closer to God, or at least to bliss (which one can equate with God) - free of our worries and over thinking, free of pain.

A Story for Everyone

This memoir is ultimately about Doyle's marriage and what she went through before and after her husband's infidelity, but it offers up a lot of thought-provoking commentary on the different issues pointed out at the beginning of this article. Even if you aren't married and do not have children (like me), you can take a lot away from this story. I was first intrigued by the title of the book, which is explained toward the end of the story, and the first few pages had me hooked. The very first sentence is, "I was loved. If love could prevent pain, I'd never have suffered." Honestly, I bought the book because I related so much to that first line.

If you have read the book or feel drawn to it, feel free to share in the comments below! Thanks for checking out my review.

Questions & Answers

    © 2018 Holley Hyler

    Comments

      0 of 8192 characters used
      Post Comment

      No comments yet.

      working

      This website uses cookies

      As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, owlcation.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

      For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://owlcation.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

      Show Details
      Necessary
      HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
      LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
      Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
      AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
      Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
      CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
      Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
      Features
      Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
      Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
      Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
      Marketing
      Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
      Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
      Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
      Statistics
      Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
      ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
      ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)