24 Struggles All INFJs can Understand
The introverted intuitive feeler judger is one of the rarest personalities of all. Myers Briggs raises this personality up like a humanitarian with prophetic powers.
Many Myers Brigg studies ask the question, why are there not more of them when we need them? The shoes are big to fill for the INFJ. Sometimes it can be the most beautiful delicate flower in a dryer than dry desert. Other times, it is the most fierce voice in the room, uncontrollably honest, uncontrollably bent on its intuition to tell people where they fall short. As the peacemaker-kings of the world, the INFJ can often be misunderstood. Weird because there is a short supply of them. Weird because... they're really nice people. The following is a list of struggles, that many INFJs face . . . constantly.
1. INFJs are extremely private. They are constantly building a world inside them and that can take awhile to unleash their secret hidden world till the timing is right, if ever right. Think of the movie Amelie.
2. INFJs have a horrible time revealing their true feelings romantically. They are overly concerned with perfectionism. They have a calm exterior, but underneath are riddled with questions and hope. How many of them move on into relationships is a mystery. But they will be the best person to date that you'll ever find. Because they'll make you cookies. Guide you well into your future. And really care about treating you and themselves right.
3. INFJS can be rock solid calm, then a strange wind happens that carries a dead bird abstract construction. Then they are super sad, and say lots of deep things from nowhere.
4. With their giant imagination and visionary minds, they can have a tough time dealing with daily, practical matters. Not being able to answer the question "What's the point?" can lead to neglecting cleaning, financial responsibilities, etc.
5. INFJS have a tendency to hyper organize certain things and code them. Such as wearing earrings that match shoes, bookshelves ordered by specific genres, or aligning objects for no reason. And yet—they have a general okayness with a few piles. Then there's the general madness when there is too much out of control. And then they have general concern if around people who hyper clean, "Are they OCD?"
6. Perfectionists. The worst thing you can do to an INFJ is set the bar too high. "What do you mean that the only way to get an 'A' is a 98%?"
7. They're super hawks of insight. INFJs struggle all the time on whether to tell people that they're about to go on a path of destruction and terror, or if they should just let people find that out themselves. They have excellent clarity for the future, but they don't want to lose friends with their candor and weirdness.
8. Their extreme insight for the future can cause a sudden feeling of, "Oh, God! The world is going to end!"
9. Insomnia. Splurges of hyperactive thought. An overindulgence of creativity. Alcohol and caffeine are more their nightmare than you could arguably understand. Caffeine causes too much creativity, alcohol causes too much honesty.
10. Mega decisive. It can be tedious to watch people struggle to make decisions, especially on basic things like ordering food, what to wear, etc. This is why an INFJ will get involved to help you make a decision, not just out of kindness, but probably because they can't stand the trivial indecision.
11. Being so involved in other people's lives that they don't understand themselves. They like to council people. They'll spend days with you. They'll spend days studying you. Then all of sudden they realize they've been a chameleon. And they'll seek solitude.
12. Most INFJS struggled with super emotional outbursts as a chlid. Being an INFJ evens out as you get older because you have the joy of language to express yourself. Can you imagine being a kid who is constantly evaluating death, disease, murder, creatures in the closet, missing parents, and did I mention death? INFJ kids are aware of death all too young. They may cry a lot and have a hard time expressing it to adults.
13. They struggle with loving a lot of creative things and not sure what they like the most. INFJs are some of the greatest students. INTPS and INTJS might be the only better students. INFJs struggle over what they like best, so they may double major, get multiple Master's degrees . . . they just really want to explore stuff they like.
14. Even though they are introverted, they are not extremely introverted. They generally have a crazy wide network of friends. They connect well with others due to their intuitive-feeling combination, and they also like to run away once the chameleon effect takes place.
15. If they don't watch their money, it can be eaten away. They are generally altruistic. They want to help. Sacrificing finances isn't going to cause a heartbreak for an INFJ... till it sinks in later that they're broke.
16. Under stress, INFJs can be super confused about priorities. Like, "Hey, you have a final tomorrow. Why are you baking chocolate pumpkin spiced muffins that take three hours to make? And you're using real pumpkin?"
17. When they see a vision of the future, they can be stubborn. And think they're right. And often are. Thus the fews times they are not... they really don't care about others' opinions. They're trying to steer people away from the big black hole of demons that only they can predict. Yikes.
18. The love of harmony runs deep in this personality. Too extreme of situations can cause an INFJ to run and hide in a closet till things are more calm. Other times, they will be the one leading everyone out of the chaos.
19. INFJs can't negotiate well if they think it will harm the friendship. Don't hurt the friendship! Anything but that!
Do you know who is also an INFJ? Billy Crystal.
20. Sometimes people think an INFJ is too nice. An INFJ usually sees themselves as 25% evil due to all the crazy things they come across and all the potential for evil things they could do.
21. If not trained, an INFJ conversation can go like this, "I was going to the store, when I thought about unicorns, so I bought a JENGA." Because somehow JENGA connected to their childhood. Because somehow unicorns connected to that too. Because they thought you somehow knew all that too.
22. INFJs are some of the best writers. They can fiercely write about everything and anything. And they never show anybody what they write out of fear of what people will think of them since their friends will realize how creepily insightful INFJs happen to be.
23. They can become extremely obsessive. An INFJ in love mode is the most obsessed creature on the planet. They may take awhile to warm up to people because they know of the insanity than can brew within. Seventy dormant volcanoes are said to live inside each INFJ.
24. They may understand the conclusion incredibly well, but have a hard time explaining it to others through a cloud of beautiful tangents. Drugs are not your friends, INFJS. You are precious, and that stuff is not going to help you explain big picture stuff.
Jamie Foxx is INFJ certified too. Yes.
Remember to love your INFJ counterparts, they sincerely love you! As much as they think about death, love is constantly on their minds. They are powerful people who just need to get involved in the world to help make it a better place. Unfortunately, it's really hard to stay that focused, especially when they want to take care of everything. Like really, let me take care of it, and you, and the neighbor down the street, and her dog. Till at last they realize that probably isn't the best approach. INFJs need encouragement, a compliment will go a long way with them. So will a joke. Expect a huge laugh. Expect strange shy things most people wouldn't dare do. Expect more laughing. They're also generally very attractive people. Go figure.