Adult Developmental Stages: Adults in Their 30's
The thirties are a decade or permanence and establishing the status quo. The thirties begin for most adults by growing a family, a predictable job, having a car and home. The thirties also allow for more financial stability and often first time home ownership.
The preparation in the 20's resolve the thirties to be a more stable and a dependable decade. Routines become more of the norm. The thirties are a time when adults are more mature and seemingly have their act together. Most adults in their thirties begin to enjoy the fruits of their labor and hard work from their twenties.
What it is Like Being in Your 30's
Being Thirty Something
The thirties are a decade in adulthood where the body is still strong and shows minimal signs of aging. They are still young enough to enjoy physical activities without worrying about pain remedies that coincides when the body ages.
Often the majority of hands on parenting happens when adults are in their thirties.
The thirties are also a time when most adults become established in their chosen careers and climb the corporate ladder.
With careers and families the thirties can be a decade with more stability and routine. For some adults in their thirties the increase of structure can be stifling. Other adults appreciate the increase of security the thirties have to offer.
Defining the Deceade: Why Your 30's Matter
- Raise a family
- Increase in income
- Home ownership
- Some will divorce
- Increase in self-identity
The Thirty Years
Some adults embrace their thirties as a reprieve from the twenties. Other adults in their thirties find this decade just as challenging or more challenging due to the extra pressures of being an established adult. The extra pressures come from being married with children- or the pressure of finding a lifelong mate if that has not happened.
In spite of the added responsibilities of marriage, family and career the thirties can be a time when adults come into their own.
Growing a Family
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Most 30-something year olds, who are also parents, are in the intense years of raising a family. It is necessary for all parents to look after their own physical, emotional and mental wellbeing while in the thick of raising a family. Lots of 30-something year olds who are also parents have less free time and less social time than they had in their twenties.
If you are a 30-something single parent than your time is even more compromised raising a family on your own.
Finding other 30-something year old peers can be a source of support and understanding. Most 30-something year old find friends through their children's activities. They connect with other moms or dads over their son's or daughter's T-ball practices.
Snapshot of What it is Like to be 30-Something
Achieve more stability
Subtle signs of aging
Stress of having more people depend on you
Continue to develop Career
Become more self aware
Hair may begin to turn grey
Worried about family/children
Grow a family
'Climb the corporate ladder'
Increase sense of self
Hair for men may begin to thin out/bald
Focus less on self more on family/work
Some will experience divorce
Pay down/off student loans
Prone to weight gain
Stable family and career can increase happiness
Establish own family traditions
Begin to invest in retirement
Increase income and savings
May feel a need to have children before turning 40
Feel more secured
Responsible for a mortgage
The Science of Hair Loss/Balding
Advice for Adults in Their Thirties
The thirties are a decade of permanence.
Here is some advice to help you manage your thirties:
- If you are raising a family, get support. Having friends, a community and extended family can make raising a family easier.
- Enjoy your family, home, car and the life you are establishing.
- If you are in a career or job you do not like, you can always explore other career and educational options.
- Do not let yourself go stale. Although the thirties do provide more stability, keep your life fresh and exciting by taking classes and doing activities you can now afford or have the additional time for.
- If you are going through a divorce, know this is not the end of your love life. Give yourself time to grieve and heal.
- Continue to take good care of your body. Eat healthy and exercise.
- If you go through a trauma or stressful event, or if your past is haunting the present go to therapy.
- Pay off your student loans.
- Begin to save for your future.
- Invest what you have left over.
- Go on vacation. Now you have extra income you can save for the vacation of your dreams.
- If you are going bald or your hair is thinning know this is a natural part of aging.
The Average age of Divorce
According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the average age for couples going through their first divorce is 30 years old. The average length of a marriage that ends in divorce is eight years. If a divorce is going to happen for a first time marriage it usually happens when the couple is in their thirties.
It is never easy when a marriage ends. Whatever the reason for the divorce, marital separation can turn your whole world upside down and trigger all sorts of painful and unsettling feelings in your thirties.
- Mental health
- Physical health
- Family relationships and ties
Divorce is painful because it represents a significant loss, not just martial loss, but also the loss of dreams and commitments.
Divorce does not mean your world is over. Divorce can be seen as a gateway to a new life, or a new beginning. You can rebuild, and re-discover who you are and love again. Emotional healing after a divorce takes time.
The Thirties are Significant
The thirties are a time for raising a family, becoming more established in a chosen career, home ownership, as well as becoming more self aware.
By the time some adults leave their thirties they have experienced a divorce from their first marriage and perhaps remarried. The strenghten and defining of one's identity is fortified in the thirties through the permanence of family relationships, careers and routines. This permanence is then carried over for adults emerging into their forties.
Carly Sullens 2013.