I'm Being Watched—How to Deal With Stalkers and Spies

Updated on September 28, 2017
theraggededge profile image

A long time ago I had a stalker. He still pops up now and then. I like to think I can help others in the same situation.

Feeling Uncomfortable? You Might Be Being Watched

Have you got that odd feeling that somebody is watching you? You may see a fleeting movement out of the corner of your eye, or you hear strange noises when the house is quiet? You wonder if your home is under surveillance. You do internet searches: ‘somebody is watching me.” The results are inconclusive and are mostly useless links to song lyrics. Nothing seems to reflect exactly how you feel. Alone. Vulnerable. Angry. Scared. Violated.

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Being Watched: It Might be Your Imagination

Nine times out of ten, it is nothing more than a feeling. Many people experience it. Severe cases are called, “The Truman Show Delusion,” after the movie where Jim Carey’s character realizes that his whole life is fictional and is being broadcast to TV audience of millions. It starts with a minor incident, such as a trash bin being knocked over late at night, then perhaps the sound of a squirrel in the roof. Your fertile imagination builds on it and attributes every sound, unexpected beep on your phone and passing footsteps to your ‘somebody is watching me’ fear. The fear becomes a phobia.

If you can be objective enough to know that your fears are unsubstantiated, but they persist nevertheless, then a course of counseling, a visit to a psychotherapist or even an honest chat with a trusted friend can set your mind at ease.

What If You Really Are Being Watched?

If you are convinced that you are under surveillance, there are several things you can do to establish if it is happening. Don’t think it will go away because it won’t. Don’t take on the mantle of victim-hood. Put yourself into a position of power and take action.

Who is Your Stalker?

Make a list of possible suspects. In essence, this will be everyone you know. In the majority of cases, the person watching you will be known to you - a personal stalker.

Personal Stalkers

  • The most common stalker is an ex or current partner. In particular people who display signs of jealousy or feel rejected are number one in the list of possible watchers. However, most of them like you to know that it’s them. Their ego demands that you recognize their ‘devotion’. They are convinced that you need to learn the truth, that underneath you are completely in love with them and just need to be shown the errors in your thinking. This behavior is a sign of mental illness. You won’t be able to convince them of this, so you need to contact someone who might be able to help. In every case, report them to the police.
  • Another kind of personal stalker is someone whom you may have upset or angered in the past. Even inadvertently. This type is less likely to advertise their identity; they just want to make you suffer in their desire for revenge.
  • Neighbors are also quite common among stalkers. They have the opportunity to watch you all the time. You may have incurred their wrath in some way and now their hobby is to make your life a misery.
  • Then there are the ‘randoms’. Someone who has taken a fancy to you. Someone who you may have exchanged a few words with and gone merrily on your way, leaving them thinking that your interaction meant far more than it actually did. These are the obsessives.
  • The last variety is the predatory stalker. These are the ones who care nothing for you as a human being, they just want to own you - even for a few minutes during which you will be subjected to horrifying experiences. These people, thank goodness, are very rare. Nevertheless, every sensible person, male or female, should take reasonable precautions when out alone. Rape alarms, pepper sprays and a noisy dog are all good methods of protection. Better still is to have some basic knowledge, and practice, of self-defense skills.
  • Whatever category your stalker comes under, they all share some commonalities. They are convinced that they are in the right. They have no idea, or don’t care, the effect their behavior has on you. They are able to rationalize their actions to any degree. In fact they don’t think they are doing anything wrong or out of the ordinary.

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How to Get Rid of a Personal Stalker

Step One - Collect Evidence

Keep a written record of every single incident, however trivial. Keep backed up electronic records too - remember that your phone or computer may be compromised so have a second device that no-one knows about. Take photos, recordings and keep them in a personal log.

Step Two - Phones and Social Media

Reset your devices to factory settings. This may only be a temporary solution but do it anyway.

Deactivate your social media accounts. Try setting new ones up under a different name and share your profiles with trusted friends one at a time, over a period of weeks.

Don’t post your life on social media. People can pick up all sorts of clues about you, your routine, places you go, etcetera. Keep it general.

Step Three - Report the Stalker

As soon as you have one or two pieces of evidence, go to the police. Register a complaint. These days they seem to be taking stalking and harassment more seriously than in previous years. Even if they can’t act because there is not sufficient evidence, there will be a record of your complaint so any officer you speak to subsequently will be able to look up the case records. Don’t be worried that the police will get fed up by your complaints. Keep them updated at all times.

Step Four - The Gray Rock Method

If the stalker is known to you and regularly tries to make contact use the ‘gray rock’ method. This term was coined by Skylar, who was a victim of a psychopath stalker and learned how to deal with him. This is a useful technique when you have to speak to the person because you have some common interest, such as a child together.

How to be a gray rock. You respond only when you have to. Your responses should be as boring and monotonous as possible. You add no inflection to your voice. You display no emotion. You only give essential facts in order to conclude the interaction.

This method works well if the stalker, an ex, shows psychopathic or sociopath tendencies. They thrive on drama so don’t give them what they want. Eventually, their behavior will change as they lose interest in you.

Gray rock can enable you to become invisible to that person, and any other, who shows an unwanted interest in you. By making yourself as boring as possible in their presence they will soon look for more interesting prey.

January is National Stalking Awareness month in the U.S.

Are You Under Surveillance?

If you suspect you are under surveillance by some sort of organization or even if an individual is watching you, read: How to Find Spy Devices in Your Home and take the steps outlined therein to find out if your home has been bugged. Remember that these days most bugging takes place via an electronic device. It couldn’t be easier for someone to install an invisible app on your phone, or hack into your laptop’s camera or microphone. They can even be installed remotely.

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Signs That You Are Under Surveillance

  • Vans parked outside your home. Often innocuous domestic type business, such as plumbing, heating, building, that sort of thing. Unless you can see actual work being carried out at a neighbor’s home, then be suspicious if this occurs regularly.
  • Unusual activity, strangers in the neighborhood, a change in the usual routine are usually nothing to worry about. However, you can sometimes feel in your gut that things are ‘off’. So keep your antennae alert for anything out of the ordinary. However, the very nature of these methods mean that the operatives who carry them out are so skilled that 99 out of 100 people will never know that they are being watched.
  • Strange noises on your house or cell phone. Sudden fast battery drainage.
  • Using a device like this Anti Spy Signal Detector, you discover a hidden microphone transmitter or video camera in your home.
  • You notice drones overhead. The ease of use and fast advancing technology makes spying-by-drone commonplace.

Reasons Why You May be Under Surveillance

  1. You engage in criminal activity.
  2. You have knowledge that could damage reputations or projects.
  3. You are involved in a legal case and the other side may be seeking to build up evidence to discredit you.
  4. You might be claiming money that you aren’t entitled to. For example disability compensation when there’s nothing wrong with you.
  5. The Government is tracking you. This is a given. Most governments now collect metadata on everyone. In the UK, CCTV tracks your every move if you live in a city.
  6. You have a mobile device, a tablet or a cell phone. Your provider is tracking you, your surfing habits, your social media posting - everything. If you take a photo, GPS data is transmitted to reveal your location. The only way to prevent this is to remove the battery.
  7. You work for a company that is being spied on by a competitor.

How to Prevent Surveillance

In short, you can’t. Unless you can prove that the surveillance is illegal, threatening, harassing or damaging, if you want to live in general society, you have to accept that your information and behavior is monitored by many agencies.

Alternatively, you can change your lifestyle, move to a location where you can live off-grid or become a nomad.

Have You Been Watched?

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    • profile image

      Paul 3 days ago

      Being continuosly bugged and followed, gang stalked is the term, all manner of harrassment, what these people can do is criminal alone, utility companies, apple, doctors, you name it, phone must be bugged, as whenever i make a call, when i call back, they say certain key words or things relative to my private life, must be masonic, no doubt

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 9 days ago from Wales

      Good luck, BRDEN, I wish you all the best and hope with all my heart you get the help you need. x

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      BRDEN82 9 days ago

      Thank you. I'm am trying a few numbers to find an advocate in NYC to help. If that doesn't work, going to have to keep going to the police by myself. Which is unfortunate here, as I feel they don't listen to you.

      Also I'm not certain that I am safe at all. One of the other reasons I left the apartment is because they were tampering with the locks whenever I went in to take my shower before work at night, and also when I came in in the morning from work, the following would intensify beginning with the super in the lobby of the building.

      I think if I went back and tried to stay at that apartment, I would not be safe at all.

      Thanks again for your help.

      BRDEN82

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 12 days ago from Wales

      BRDEN, I'm in the UK so I don't think I could do much. I wouldn't be able to publish it here - audio files aren't supported. Keep recording, keep reporting it. It doesn't seem that they are trying to physically hurt you so keep fighting. No one deserves to be treated like this.

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      BRDEN82 12 days ago

      Bev,

      Thanks for your reply. I would be happy to forward you one of the audio files. I know exactly how this sounds. Generally speaking I would have the same reaction you do. One of the people whose been doing this lives right across the hall from the apartment I left. But it's weird because as I mentioned, the following is not just in the apartment, but to everywhere, to every single hostel or shelter I've stayed at. And the question for me is how is that even done?!

      Trust me, I know this sounds very strange. If I didn't recognize her voice so well, along with constantly re-listening to the recordings, I would think the same as you.

      BRDEN82

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 12 days ago from Wales

      I'm not really sure how to help you, BRDEN. I think you are already doing the right thing by recording what you hear. Have you managed to get close to the source of the voices? For instance, one particular wall, your phone or other device? Keep doing it and maybe consider a private detective?

      The thing is, when people started leaving comments like these, I really thought most of them had mental health issues, however, I'm getting so many of them (and you wouldn't believe how many don't get approved at all) that I'm beginning to think there is more to this 'phenomena'. Please feel free to update us on how it goes for you. Take care x

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      BRDEN82 13 days ago

      Updating my post below... while reading over it this morning, I realize how awfully crazy and schizo it sounds. The only problem is I am in my 50s and I have never had anything where I hear random voices. I've certainly had my fair amount of stress, but never hearing voices.

      I wish I could post the audio files of my recordings. The problem with the police is they are not very tech savvy and have no idea how these location tracking apps work. I don't either. And so the cops I've spoken to literally play devils advocate and come up with every excuse imaginable of what the recordings could be. Like right now I am in a hostel, and I am hearing this same woman's voice from my apt building (especially while I am in the shower). (Yes I've recorded that to.)

      The cop says to me, that could be one of the other guest staying at the hostel. I told them it's not. I've lived across the hall from this woman for many years, and its her and her daughters, not anybody else! I just feel they come up with every reason not to help you. In my case I fear something could go wrong by the time I get some help.

      If I couldn't hear anything from the recordings and haven't had this woman following me all over the place, to every single hostel I've stayed at, I would have to consider that I have a problem, but that's not the case.

      Also the other familiar thing to Chika's story, is beside the fact that the super (who works for the Landlord) started this, but there was a ton of banging on the walls, particularly after I came in from work -- all from the same woman and her daughters and the super and his friends.

      Thanks for any help or advice you could give.

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      Like my old world is unreachable 13 days ago

      I have been stalked for over two years now. All attempts to seek help are fruitless. Searching for an attorney feels like a waste of time. I never hear back. Called the board for x referral and was asked what I was doing to cause me to be stalked. I believe she actually referred to me as the common denominator in my stalking my situation. Tired. Hopeless. Don’t wanna fight this anymore.

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      BRDEN82 2 weeks ago

      This is so strange. Chika's story sounds very similar to mines, accept I left my apartment and am currently living in a hostel, but I don't believe they've physically followed me to the hostel.

      But here's what happened to me, I left my rent stabilized apartment six months ago, because the super and people who live across the hall, somehow installed something in the apartment, or via an app or something that allows them to view me inside the apartment. So that each room I walked into, the crackhead lady who lives across the hall would literally say something to me in that particular room. I leave that room, go to another room, she would follow me in the other room and say something in that room also.

      This went on 24 hours day, even if I got up to go to the bthrm at 3 in the morning, they would follow me in the bathroom. THe voices would change after several hours so it seems there was several people doing this. Which leads me to wonder whether these people were hired by the landlord.

      The reason I think they are using an app though is because the hostel that I've been staying at, they've been following me there also, (sounds really crazy, but its true and I've recorded them) but there not staying in the hostel, it seems they're using an app, or phone tracker, but they must have a way to see me, because wherever I go inside the hostel, they follow me in that room also, and say things to me.

      I go in the shower, the follow me in the shower or to use the toilet, they taunt and harass me in there as well. Same at work. The only difference is at work, they spend the entire night hacking into my computer. I work as a temp at various lawfirms and I've literally sat at my desk and watched emails being deleted in the middle of the night when no one is at work but me. I'm not even touching the mouse. Same voices I hear, are the same ones I heard inside the apartment, and same voices I hear inside the hostel. (All of which I've recorded.)

      It's very strange. The only thing I know is, the woman's voice who I hear most times is the woman whose lived across the hall from us since '97. My children have moved out. I am middle aged and have lived alone for a while now. I am very strong in my faith, and either watch a lot of spiritual programs and/or read my bible a lot. They say a lot of things that are evil-related. Not sure if this is done to try and scare me.

      It's been difficult getting help from the police, or the Landlord, which is why I ended up leaving. If anybody knows what this is or how this is being done or if this is the government or landlord that does things like this, please reply to my post. I would appreciate it so much.

      I am homeless and desperate for help. I can't go back to the apartment, because the harassment would just be ten times worse from these people. Thanks again so much.

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 2 weeks ago from Wales

      But why, Chika? Why would they spend so much money and use so many resources trying to intimidate you? And how are they making comments? And you left the country... what happened then?

      And I don't understand what you mean about them targeting parts of your body. How? There's no technology that can do that.

      Get proof. Take it to the police.

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      chika45 2 weeks ago

      Its my former landlord and her family. Even the little boy, sometimes. lmao.

      I hear their voices in my apartment or here in my hotel or on the plane, but never in a car. I suffer from shocks, cramps, headaches and vibrations directed all over my body. When I get into the tub, I see the water rippling over whatever body part that they're targeting at the moment.

      Usually their idiotic comments are that I'm sleeping too much, (i get only 1 to 4 each night), eating too much, wasting food, or gas, or electricity, or water, just plain stupid drivel, day and night.

      I would've thought that I was losing it or getting sick, but they bang the walls, floors, ceiling, depending on where i am, day and night. Some people who stay close by complain and call the police, but this family always talks their way out of it.

      They also hire other immigrants in shifts??? This sounds so ridiculous.

      I've tried moving out of state, leaving the country, nothing works.

      Apparently they have several businesses, are financially well off, so they do this for fun.

      They are extremely good friends with my mom, or rather, they have her wrapped around their pinkie. She enjoys being the center of attention of rich people??? I feel like I've been sold, or rather sacrificed.

      So here I am, in a hotel, they're banging all day, all night, they rented the room above and next to me, that shares a wall with my bed. I tried changing rooms three times. The manger studies the screen of available rooms like its an end of term exam, at least five minutes. Money opens all doors, doesn't it?

      And they're having a blast. I have the full attention of a family of psychopaths. I never knew that I was soooo special.

    • profile image

      Jim 3 weeks ago

      I feel as though my neighbor is recording and listening to everything I do in My house. Theyve been acting strange and it gets me on guard because it's not normal. Theyve had a problem with me since I've been here. Now it's got worse. I feel so alone with this issue and no one can help.

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      ThomasTeal 4 weeks ago

      I feel as though my ex is spying on me she may even have been cheating so she always get info on me some times like where im at i just want to know how do i find out if she out side my window spying on me i mean cant i send her a text and as soon as she opens it i know she see it and i know that shes not learking out side my bedroom

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      Overthemoon93 4 weeks ago

      Hi this is simular to what I went through except the person came to me on my old property with a threat I have never felt more uncomfortable in my entire 24 years I actually moved a couple blocks away and it has stoped apparently it was some bullies down the street from me I had no clue what the issue was until a couple months later. I had gone to some one I knew whom we where really close to and said she saw the same thing and knew who it was but never bothered to talk it out.

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      Puppeteer 4 weeks ago

      Spying on American consumers and indie producers is huge profits, and creative intel for corporations. That's why they call it the information ages. All the celebrities do it. They use satelite radar, sonar, thermal and infrared to watch your every move and while you sleep. Your data and creativity is money, videos , commercials and films. You can't prove it or do anything about it expect learn to make money of yourself the same way they make money off you. It's about nothing but MONEY!

      If you dance well they don't have to hire you. The TV Satelite people just thermo image track you in your house. It's business as usual in America.

    • theraggededge profile image
      Author

      Bev 6 weeks ago from Wales

      You must collect proof, Gloria. Make recordings of them, install security cameras and check for hidden cameras in your home. Once you have evidence that they are spying, you can go to the police

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      Gloria Trujillo 6 weeks ago

      I have these neighbors that have a surveillance camera that record and listen I feel that they're listening in to our conversation because I keep hearing them repeating everything I say can I hear them actually repeat what I say because they have a video camera that hears

    • theraggededge profile image
      Author

      Bev 7 weeks ago from Wales

      Lark, read my article here: https://owlcation.com/social-sciences/My-Neighbors...

      Meanwhile, don't allow them to interfere with your life. Develop a strategy of ignoring them, and distracting yourself from them. Don't stare back or you could be perpetuating the problem. The more you notice it, the more you'll get it.

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      Lark 7 weeks ago

      I am having an issue with nosey neighbours on my street. I simply leave my house to hang out with my friends or go out in general and they watch me. I will be stared down if they are outside and they make it obvious. It’s not like they say hi or try and get to know me. I also notice when I go out with friends they peer at me from their curtains. It’s strange and creepy to the point even my friends notice it so happening. I feel uncomfortable with the situation and being in their neighbourhood because of it. Any helpful suggestions anyone can give me would be greatly appreciated.

    • theraggededge profile image
      Author

      Bev 7 weeks ago from Wales

      Lou, the technology isn't there to be able to read your thoughts. It's also very unlikely that DWP have the resources available.

      Clicking in the ears is quite common. I get it sometimes https://www.fauquierent.net/earclicking.htm

      I think you are fine and no-one has put anything in your head.

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      Louvwhyte 7 weeks ago

      I know I'm being investigated by the department of work and pensions fraud squad, (I'm innocent) but around 2/3months ago I started hearing clicks in my ears and eyes feel like there's lenses in them , now I know this because stupidly they've used upstairs flat to watch from and I've heard them plotting against me , literally I've heard alot..and I'm now convinced that they've put something inside my head to listen in on my inner voice, and watch and record me through cyber lenses, I know if I just get one person who believes me I can prove it as it's in my head , please help me prove this device is there , u seem to know what to do

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 2 months ago from Wales

      If you are sure he has a camera in your apartment, then find it and disable it. Now you're living there, he can't get in there to replace it. Find the bugs... and destroy them, Carol.

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      Carol Soriano 2 months ago

      Its my next door neighbor he has a camera in his home hooked up to see inside my apt. Don’t know how, but I can hear him telling his girl friend what I’m doing eating, dressings showering etc.

      He’ always there I’ve never seen him only her. From the minute I come home to the minute I leave for work. He has such a loud voice even though he whispers. I have lived there a year already, he’s only been their several months. But I like my little apt.

      What should I do who do I call.

      I’ve been taking showers at one of my daughters homes. He’s very confident and comfortable spying on me. Once I said to myself I’m goig to tell mgr. loud enough for him to here me, and he laughed. He has kmow fear, because he has friends in this Senior build where he could get rid of his equipment in a hard beat. What do I do can anyone help me? I live alone yet they are always their discussing my business.

    • theraggededge profile image
      Author

      Bev 2 months ago from Wales

      Hi Claire, you must collect proof that this is happening. Photos, videos, written logs. Only by doing that will you be able to take action. The first thing to do is to find out the source of this harassment. Read through the article and the comments here for suggestions. Good luck and take care.

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      Claire Parke 2 months ago

      I have been and am being watched and followed. This has been going on since 2013. I am not paranoid. At first I tried to ignore it and put it down to imagining things or coincidence.

      I am not sure if it is my ex employer (I resigned and filed a complaint). An ex best friend who I fell out with years ago and has enough money and time on her hands, as she is bored. My ex boyfriend who came in and out of my life but begruges me.

      When I go down to town I am followed. I have tested this by slowing down and the person has slowed down too or stopped to look at a shop and this has happened so many times I have lost count. Natrually the person following is not the same person each time. I am unable to make friends as I used to. I am sociable and outgoing. As soon as I meet someone the person is very nice to me and then suddenly changes for no reason and takes a distance. I recently moved to a new area, my neighbour was charming to me when I first arrive and suddenly took a distance for no reason.

      I am unable to open a Facebook page, it says 'you have to use your real name'. I did manage last year and I got messages : 'your Facebook page has been closed for security purposes'. I am unable to open a page which links people to go out together. I am unable to join a French/English discussion groupe as I am blocked.

      If I apply for a job, the interview goes fine and sometimes I am accepted. However after the interview either by phone or face to face, the employer comes up with a ridiculous excuse not to take me. If I am taken literally 3 days later the employer will tell me that he/she can no longer keep me.

      I know my mobile is hacked as phone numbers disapear, texts and messages.

      I imagine that this message will not even get through. If it does it will be a miracle.

      I know I cannot stop this. What I do not know is why this is going on and why it has been going on for so long.

    • theraggededge profile image
      Author

      Bev 2 months ago from Wales

      Hi AntiStalker,

      Your weapon is to gather proof. As much as you can. If you can surreptitiously record them on your phone or some small camera. Keep detailed logs of incidents. Ask neighbours to do the same. Once you have built up enough evidence, take it to the police and to your local authority. Due to recent high-profile cases, the UK is very pro-active in preventing/dealing with stalking and harassment.

      Don't try to fight your next-door neighbours openly because you won't win. Use your intelligence and resourcefulness to beat them. Take every opportunity to bring their antics to the attention of the council and your MP. If you keep complaining,they'll do something. Oh, and mention to the police that you are in fear of your life, that'll get them moving. Good luck.

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      AntiStalkerUK 2 months ago

      I completely get how utterly miserable and life-destroying it is when neighbours stalk you. We moved in to a different area in order to help a vulnerable relative. Since we arrived the people next door have harassed and intimidated us relentlessly. They permanently park outside our house, despite having an empty driveway themselves, camp outside and perv into our windows around the clock, have rigged some disgusting camera/monitor to film directly into our home. Them and their 'associates' shine industrial floodlights into our bedroom and sitting room at night, to film us getting undressed - as well as filming our back room from their garden. We are new to the area - they have lived there for generations and their friends/associates - all of whom are chronically obese - gather outside our house to intimidate us. My husband has been followed home from work on several occasions - with people so close behind him he can hear them panting. I have arrived home to some associate lying in wait. then making silly filming gestures. Why are they tracking our every move? They film us around the clock - but it has escalated. They have now violently trespassed on our property, kicked and banged our doors and clearly pose a serious threat of violence. We need help. We have not confronted them, despite all their attempts to force a confrontation because we wanted to sell our home after renovation, Sadly, they have lowered the value of the entire street and we will not be able to sell our home.. The entire street will now have to declare this stalking until it is resolved. What a horrible trap. We feel sick. Any advice??

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      Trudy516 2 months ago

      .. I have a neighbor that has been stalking me..he lives downstairs from me in a condo complex....we both are owners...he is 20 years older than me....late 60's....he lives by himself and so do I....he is a real creep...was a big drinker years back, as I over hear him talk about it....just looking at him is so creepy....he watches and listens to my whole life...the walls are thin....he sits under my kitchen area, as we have the same layout of our condos...he starts the day at 6 am or 7 depending when I GET UP....yup.....he can actually hear me turn in my bed and get up...he rushes to sit under my kitchen, I hear him go from room to room as I walk, as he moves and screeches his chairs around the floor to annoy me...this is a new thing with the chairs...he use to be discreet about it...but then I realized he has been listening to my life and routine for the past 6 years...alot to write here...but will simplify it ...he would show up at the mailbox saying how great he thought I was, for knowing how to paint etc my condo..he says how he was chaulking his bath tub too...how would he know that I was ?? then realized he was listening to me chaulk my tub !! ..he would rush to talk to me and offer to do things for me...telling me how my tire was low on my car, then suddenly coming to my door to tell me it was flat and wanting to fix it for me....but I rejected him...at this point I just stayed away from him, I even park my car now at the end of my building so he can't see my routine.....he would always show up at the grocery store and I would think how odd he was always there at the exact time...then until this past year had I realize he runs out to his car within minutes after I do, then shows up at the store....so recently....he once again showed up....and I turned the tables on him....by following him around the store and taking pictures.....which he then knew that I KNEW HE WAS FOLLOWING ME ! he then ran out the store and disappeared...unfortunately I live by myself...he use to blow cigarette smoke up my walls into my vents even when I was in the shower...as he can hear this....until I finally told the manager about it...then it stopped....he also bullied the last owner here an 85 year old woman and scared her away as she packed up and moved away......seems he tends to go after women to intimidate....I made the manager aware of him and his stalking behavior...but seems there is nothing for anyone to do at this point..so when I know he's sitting below my kitchen, I let him know he's being watched by yelling it out with his name, sounds pathetic I know....I also pretend I have someone with me by talking out loud...how odd the smuck seems to stop moving his chairs around when I do that....a real sicko....I even spoke with the local sheriff and was told until the smuck is sitting in the parking lot of my job or grocery store parking lot, then I can call them to come he also told me I should just move ...recently he started making his moves up by my door talking to a neighbor outside my door with no shirt on, I told him to stay away from my door or I'll call the sheriff....he then cursed me out.....the smuck also recruited a few other losers with him...lonely horny 60 something year old men, who have nothing else to do, they sit around no jobs living off of SSI. .....and never saw a young girl before....really is disgusting...I also had to call the cops on his pal recently for cursing at me as he walked past me...he's about 500 pds btw......who also had hit on me by coming to my door saying how we should get to know each other.... but now he is disgruntled and together they are a team along with a few others all acting like victims....I'm thinking of getting a body guard just to show muscle once a week at my home....since I'm not with anyone now...sheriff actually told me to keep a gun in my home...can u believe we're at that point ...unreal......if I could move I would...glad I found this column...any suggestions from others please write to me, I want to hear other stories as well...I live in the state of Florida btw. guns are allowed in your home without a license and there is a stand your ground law, where you're allowed to protect yourself........can you believe !!

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      Adam H 2 months ago

      Ya the best advice any one can receive bout being watched by over baring P.O.S. is to make it known that you know..expose them loud,ridiculously but sarcasticly ..you will be laughed at and ridiculed but what else can you do...embrace the paranoia don't let it consume you..most if not all the time these pukes do win and get what info they want.. But don't let them gain enjoyment from there actions trying to tear your world down....also get your close family up to date and how to go bout normal life....

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      Cristina 2 months ago

      Everyone's story sounds exactly like mine . There are some details that I can't write because everything is public and it only makes it worse when I communicate about it. Every neighbor is stalking me using techniques with timing and creating noise. Whoever is above me has political connections and has the ability to have the police and fire department involved as well as mass transit. They are using all gang stalking techniques road blocking street theater you name it there is no escaping it. It has been affecting my physical health that I have documentation of. I fight to have 5 minutes of peace a day. This requires every ounce of mental endurance to survive. What can be done when drones and government vehicles are involved. I haven't ever hurt anyone in my life . I am being tortured every second of my life. If I go outside there is a group of vehicles passing by me. If I say too much the police will surround me. I am expecting a huge punishment for posting this but it can't be any worse than my life now. There really isn't anyone to help what do you do? I never knew what this was until I had to research it. They are tampering and trying to destroy my vehicle and trying to kill me when I'm driving. I will seek justice because this is illegal

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      Bev 3 months ago from Wales

      Hi there, Hindering. It seems to me that you are making assumptions about what other people are thinking. So, what you do about it is: go about your business in a polite and pleasant way. Say 'hello' to anyone you pass in your neighborhood. If they ignore you, then that's **their** problem, not yours.

      There's a great quote from Abraham-Hicks, "What you think of me is none of my business."

      Go for a run, do.

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      Hindering my entire life and including my families 3 months ago

      I have a whole neighborhood that does not like me. They have all put up surveillance cameras, when I wave at them they look the other way or shake their head, when I arrive home someone is outside from my neighborhood, when I leave maybe it is a coinincidence it is like they know I am leaving, and all sorts of weird things have been happening. Maybe it is my insecurity because when my father, uncle, and close family friend died in less than two years it was a traumatic experience for me. To make this shorter, I am now doing great in regard to getting myself back but it is a BETTER me. I am so proud of myself but I still have all this sickness, sadness, and I am constantly full of anxiety because it is like they thing I am a criminal. I have friends that come to my house and hang out and I have friends of different ethnicity and honestly I feel like I am being judged on so many different things. I am not a criminal, I went through a hard time; my father was my everything, and I am just trying to make a better life for my family and make true relationships and friendships. How do I approach this? Ignore it or do I address it and go up to my neighbors and introduce myself? I leave my house rarely which is hindering my entire life. I thought your home was your safe spot and it is just a nightmare for me. I could also just be wrong and I am just insecure and it is all in my head because I care toooooo much of what people think. I can't hinder my life anymore. I want to go for a run and I want to leave my house and not feel like I am being "watched" when it could just be my stupid butt being insecure. Ugh...It makes me honestly sick to my stomach anytime I think about it.

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      VictimOfStalkers 3 months ago

      This article has really helped me. I have neighbors that have been harassing me since they moved on my floor. They have tried to gain access to my apartment by making up bogus stories. The wife began following, questioning myself and my daughter. Then she began threatening me "Someone is going to rob me" and "She never knows when I'm in my apartment". Someone made a bogus call to Adult Protective Services on me. When the person came I caught them looking at my computer. They asked for my social security number and my date of birth but I refused to give it to them. Their are several men, security guards and maintenance men in my building that have made unwanted passes at me. I have seen one of these maintenance men coming out of her apartment. So I know that they are the source of this harassment. I'm sure I have angered one or more because I had to report them. One for continued harassment and the other for following me. I know that they have hacked into my computer and are listening to conversations via the intercom in my apartment. I have been to the police and I am documenting. Also, my mail is being compromised.

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      Bev 4 months ago from Wales

      Hi Nikki, that's an incredible story. Have you checked that there is no electronic reason why the video equipment stops working? It's possible that there is electromagnetic activity in, or near, your mother's home which is interfering. Do other things break down or show signs of interference, such as laptop, phone, TV, etc.? It's always good to rule out the simplest explanation before concluding that there is something more sinister going on.

      Always mark the edge of your SD cards with a touch of a hardly visible pen or dark nail varnish or something.

      Keep records of everything, which it sounds like you are doing. And do your best to get some real proof - research how to really hide a camera, install your own listening devices, place simple devices like pieces of thread across doorways, sprinkle talc on floors in order to see if anyone is walking on them. Even get a trusted friend to spend a couple of nights at your mom's, preferably with an even bigger dog. Good luck.

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      Nikki 4 months ago

      My mom has been stalked for years now. They have gotten into her condo, took her jewelry box, cheques from a cheque book but will leave the empty book behind, passport, mail taken from the mailbox, they empty her face creams and sometime refill it with hand cream, they have emptied vitamin bottles that were just bought, the list goes on and on. You would think it was maybe some kind of Alzheimer's but when I put in a spy camera, they remove the SD memory card and replace it with a new one. I have had recordings on it before I would install it at my mom's and the recordings will all be gone. I started to put tape over the SD memory card opening and have had that cut open. I hid the spy cam once behind her wall unit and again, glued and taped over the hole. I had a few videos on it from my place before installing it. When I viewed it a week later, the card needed to me formatted! All pictures gone and just an empty memory card. It made me think someone switched the card to a new one. She moved to my house because we thought that would be a better situation. It started all over again. Now someone is coming into my house! I have a large dog, a daughter and we had a very good combination pad lock put on her door, installed a hard-wired security camera that is not attached to the internet (I didn't want anyone compromising the system) and things still go missing. She bought in the winter some spikes for walking on ice for her boots...gone! She has had bank statements; mortgage statement go missing. The other day I had 2 applications on my dining table to be mailed to hydro and one to the gas company. This was for discounts for her being low income. I put them there. It was there for over 2 weeks in 2 neat piles. I kept forgetting to get my mom to sign them. There were there and the next day, all gone! All her income statements, copies of taxes etc. Gone! So now I am going crazy too??!! When I check my security cameras, and remember, this is hard wired camera, no wireless, no internet, just good old fashion recording camera’s and there are 7 of them around the house, I see one camera that is inside our home that would go black and then as the light comes back on, you see a quick streak going across the screen. I’ve seen this a few times now with one of the camera’s. I check the others to see if I see a time stamp around the same time with strange activity but nothing. We have concluded that this is her life now. These people are sophisticated, trained and have 007 FBI status. They must! How can they keep an eye on all the houses around me, know when my daughter is not home, I am not home, get by my dog, 7 hard-wired cameras and anyone that can come home at any given time? She keeps buying things and they just go missing. The other day, she made a sandwich and left it in her car. She went on her hike but when she came back, someone ripped the sandwich open and poked their finger in the sandwich and made a hole. WFT?? Last year, they left dead flowers on her car. We try to tell the police but since the stories are so wacked out, they don’t believe us and at one pint, got mad at us thinking we are all just crazy. I think that is what is happening here. They want that. They don’t want anything to really get stolen, just cause trouble and the stranger the story the more police will not help you if it is not text book. We stopped calling them. These people are making your life miserable. That is their goal and purpose…to destabilize you mentally. Making you think you are crazy. I don’t know how to keep them out of my house. I need help! I’ve kept logs…some have disappeared. Now I keep everything at work but I am suspicious here now too. There is so much more but I can’t add everything here. Help!

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 4 months ago from Wales

      Kary, arrange for your mail to be delivered to a PO box or a friend's address. Do not interact with these people in any way. Take photos/video of any incidents. Keep records. Go to the police.

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      Kary 4 months ago

      It's my neighbors, MM and SM. The M' s want my home for free. They lost it in a foreclosure and now they are Evil neighbors harassing me constantly. I'm a female who lives alone and they bully me they even went as far as getting a stalking order and every single word from both of their stocking orders were absolute lies down to that I stole their goose when a wild goose landed in my yard and wouldn't leave for 15 days and said that I pushed the husband in scratch the Sun's face and yell at her while I'm shaking my fence and we have never physically touched not even shook hands I don't speak to them and I found out the husband went to a place where I go and ask too many questions about me and my plans I don't know if he's planning to harm me physically but they are vicious and ruining my life any shoot my dog with a air pistol I guess it's BB's I'm not sure but it makes her cry and she's a very good dog this being abused with me and I want it to stop he even threatened the person that was going to rent this place so I could move away and then they would not move in because he feared for his brand-new babies life and his woman's life. He is running my livelihood and that is illegal but ever since he did that he's been harassing me worse because he knows he's in trouble as soon as I fill my paperwork in and handed in back to court we go he steals my mail so I missed court and he won on a default and got my money out of the bank because I didn't show up and I'm not the type to not show up at court he still steals my mail sometimes I get my mail that's a month or two late if anybody knows what to do to make it stop so I don't retaliate please post it because I'm starting to feel stupid by not retaliating but I believe and leave the Revenge the Lord but it is not going away it's not stopping and I'm getting an angry attitude out of life when that is not how I used to be

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      Godly neighbor 4 months ago

      I & my family have been stalk by a neighbor from hell name BB, his family & accomplices.

      His wife CH was an Assistant DA in Manhattan but lost her job.

      Me & my family was been in court for 10 yrs. Now criminal & civil court.

      BB wants to EXTORT my family money, wants our home & other assets.

      I try to avoid this neighbor fr. He'll

      But I got stalk all the way to Manhattan Q train

      I went to the police but they don't wanna deal with it.

      Ps. Pray for this neighbor to stop.

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      Bev 4 months ago from Wales

      How do you know this, Geraldine?

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      Geraldine Bridgeford 4 months ago

      My neighbor has my phone hacked...her and her brother. .ti have reset my phone and even change my number..but all they do is go in the back yard and pick up some kind of signal and they can liatern to my phone calls ..read my text..look at my photo..everything. .is there an apl that can stop thia..

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      Bev 5 months ago from Wales

      Sky, collect evidence, keep a record of every incident. When you have sufficient evidence of harassment go to the police. Meanwhile, hold your head up and pretend they don't exist.

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      Sky 5 months ago

      What to do? My neighbors are keeping tabs on me. Using their friends and other people to watch me.They're doing severe acts of intimidations on me. Having these peole follow me to work, other places I go. I dont know who to turn too for help. I tried to tell everybody but no one believes me. They keep harrassing me. I've been keeping electronic record of all of it. I even told them to stop it. Leave me alone. They shook their heads no. I'm female and their all men and men sometimes their girlfriends and other family members, their friends join in too. To harrass me too. I feel alone.

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      Bev 6 months ago from Wales

      @Eileen, sorry to hear of your problems. Please keep a record of every suspicious incident. Take photos, record conversations and do a bug sweep of your home. I hope you get it sorted soon.

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      Bev 6 months ago from Wales

      Set tests, Lana. Catch them out and play games with them. Be cleverer than them. Good luck.

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      Lana 6 months ago

      This information was very helpful. I think I'm currently being spied on by several people who are working for the same company as I am. I can tell they're fake and liars because it's like they share or know about info I've never shared with anyone. These spies of mine claim I know them when in fact I never talk to them at all. I literally don't talk to anyone. It's just incredible how deceptive these people are.

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      Bev 6 months ago from Wales

      I'm very sorry for your situation, Heymain, and for others who have commented here in similar vein. All you can do is try to confound them by whatever means possible (there have been many suggestions here in the comments) and carry on living your life to your best ability. Look for those little moments of peace and joy. The happier you are, the more likely you are to upset their experiments. If people turn against you then know that their friendship was shallow and easily swayed. It's obviously very difficult for you, but know that there are others here who believe your story.

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      Scott Gaspard 6 months ago from Parsons West Virginia USA

      Beleive me if i could afford to leave this nightmare i would have left when i realized how well funded this group and the measures they would take to continue this madness. I really didnt realize there were so many narcissistic people. Its truly unbeleivable that people can put someone theough such hell and still sleep at night.

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      Scott Gaspard 6 months ago from Parsons West Virginia USA

      As I said earlier I lost everything twice and I am unable to work because of a back injury I received in a car accident. So I have to survive on a very small monthly government check. It is a hopeless situation. It has been from the start.

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 6 months ago from Wales

      I believe you. Could you leave the US? Is there anything keeping you there?

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      Scott Gaspard 6 months ago from Parsons West Virginia USA

      Hi I just read your article and found it insightful. I am the victim of group stalking for over 2 years now and I'm at the end of my rope. I have lost everything twice because of this. Been homeless on the streets while being tormented the entire time. I am unsure of the reasoning but I know that most are Freemasons. They appear as everyday people but they are far from that. Some are even emt, firefighters and police officers. My father was a police officer but not a freemason. Shortly after his death is when everything started. My closest friends and family were turned against me and I'm sure they were paid or coersed in some way or another because in a matter of days of them finding some unexplainable reason to eject me from their life a financial windfall would come in to play for them. I am never alone. Even now as i write this it is being monitored because no matter what in so any phone I get in a matter of a few days always ends up having some unexplainable system programs installed that cannot be removed by me. Even my service provider verified that my phone has been hacked on several occasions so I have stopped trying to prevent it. It started in South Louisiana and has followed me to Ohio, Pennsylvania and now West Virginia. Every place it's the same thing. I stopped going to the police a long time ago when I found out they wouldn't help me. At the beginning my girlfriend was involved and her part was to convince me that I was having a nervous breakdown. It wasn't until i was approached by a friend from grade school 6 months later that told me he was approached by another one of my gradeschool friends and was told he could make some money by doing things to make me feel paranoid. He refused and was also shunned. Where I am now I have been here for 2 months and that is about how long it usually takes for things to start changing. Last weekend I went camping with a group of awesome people that I met since I moved to a VERY small town in the mountains. We had an amazing weekend, it was the first time since it started that I truly felt comfortable. All was great. But last night I went over as we had planned for a get together and everyone was acting VERY strange and after leaving only an hour later I stopped by the convenient store and noticed that a car at the pumps and one at the air machine had Louisiana plates! I don't know what to do. And today I have been hearing what sounds like someone moving about in the attic over my apartment. I live in an apartment building and the attic access is in the hall way and the maintenance man has not been here today. I asked him. I didn't say why I was asking because he would think I'm nuts. Also a few different familiar looking "followers" as I call them, vehicles have been seen across the street parked. I have an eye for detail because of all this so I make mental notes of identifying marks and such on cars and I know without a doubt that three vehicles I have seen today are three that I had seen in Louisiana regularly. I know it sounds crazy. Hell it sounds crazy to me too and that is why I can't get help. I just don't know what else to do. I'm not crazy but it's making me that way. I'm scared and alone because I can't trust anyone and I can't reach out because no one will believe me. I want to give up. I don't what else to do.

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 6 months ago from Wales

      Dean, you have to get pro-active. Begin keeping a record of everything suspicious. It has to be concrete though - take the license plate numbers, do a bug sweep of your home, check your phone and other devices, take photos of these vehicles - sometimes that all you need to do to make it stop - let them see you actively fighting back. Do all the things suggested in the article and in the comments. Being pro-active about your own privacy will give you courage and will provide evidence for when you need it.

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      dean 6 months ago

      How do i go on because i know for a fact that my neighbour is constantly stalking me and watching evey move i make they are enen getting cars and vans to follow me it's got to the stage now that when i go out i can't get back in and cars and vans are watching and following me,i know something bad is going to happen to me,i have reported it more than once to the police and they are just not interested and now i am really fearing for my safety and my life,can somebody please help?

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      Wow 7 months ago

      It is very helpful and direct what someone needs who asks questions and receives no answers.

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      XY 8 months ago

      Any where I go they can see me even in the washroom. Voices are very weak so when I record them it is not easy to understand what they are saying.

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 10 months ago from Wales

      I know, Suzanne. The problem is that it's just too common... and too easy to do this to someone for the police to act on every report of stalking. We have to be our own detectives and collect as much proof as possible. Then you have to demonstrate that this is causing you harm. Then you have to start making as much fuss as you can with every agency you can think of.

      Set traps. Talk about something that you wouldn't normally talk about and see where that conversation is repeated back at you. So for instance, if you think your phone is bugged - text or phone a trusted friend and say you are thinking about making a large purchase, say a car or TV. If you think there's an actual device in your home, talk out loud to yourself about getting a dog or booking a vacation. Be specific. See if anyone mentions those things to you.

      Get yourself a cheap bug detector and use it all round your home and car. Reset your phone and computer to factory settings (after backing up all necessary info). Take control and fight back.

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      Suzanne 10 months ago

      I'm been stalked, I'm followed & my house is bugged.

      I'm not imagining it, there is to many coincidences.

      There should be a law where police should at least look into it. Not told to keep a diary & ignote it. Worst they make you feel like your crazy, with out even following up to what you say.

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      Bev 11 months ago from Wales

      Does it? I'll have to find out about that. Thanks, Chuck. I always cover my camera and have changed all my settings to maximum 'Get lost Microsoft', iykwim.

    • Chuck Bluestein profile image

      Chuck Bluestein 11 months ago from Morristown, AZ, USA

      Windows 10 has a spying feature that cannot be shut off.

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      Bev 12 months ago from Wales

      He probably understands English perfectly well. I don't speak French but I can often work out what is being said. I can't help you with your dad problem, but have replied to your previous message. Hope you get it sorted.

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 12 months ago from Wales

      Do you use a laptop or tablet with a camera? Cover up the camera with a piece of tape. Make sure your security settings are set so that apps cannot activate the camera. You can Google how to do it for your operating system.

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      Hi 12 months ago

      And, I think my dad is somehow related to this. He doesn't speak English, but he seems to know the conversation happening in English before I said anything to him about the 'stalking' incident.

      He does this quite frequently, and when that happens, I always confront him and ask him how he knows that. Of course, he always denies that, but he's an experienced lawyer and he knows how to lie.

      I don't know who I can trust any more. And I'm completely lost, in despair. What should I do?

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      Hi. 12 months ago

      I think I'm being watched because the suspected watcher is making it very clear that he knows about how I look, what I dress, and what my habits are. But I don't know how this is even possible since the suspected watcher is living in another country. What can I do? He is refusing to give me any further information and he doesn't seem to stop it.

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 12 months ago from Wales

      Another country? How do you know? Any idea who or what organization? You might need a more accurate device or one that is specifically for locating bugs, Sheila. I would make it my mission to locate and destroy them.

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      sheila 12 months ago

      I have regular stalkers from another country. I believe that my home was hard-wired for bugs before I moved in as it was being rehabbed for me. I have definite proof that they have had someone enter my home several times as they have left signs of entry that are unmistaken, such as removing a screw in some switch plates (light plates). I even found it in the exact box I used to replace some before. They knew exactly where it was and put the removed screw right back in there.

      I have scanned for RF signals and found them loud and clear. However, it did not give me a clue where I could find any hidden devices.

      Thanks.

    • theraggededge profile image
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      Bev 12 months ago from Wales

      Hi moonlake.

      Indeed, Alexa records everything it can pick up on its microphone. Here in the UK, several families were bemused and confused when their devices picked up on a TV program about dollhouses and then actually ordered dollhouses on their Amazon accounts. Amazon says that they don't do anything with recorded information but it is streamed back to them, for sure.

      I expect you could get rid of your stalker if you brazenly walked out and photographed him and his license plate.

      Thanks and cheers.

    • moonlake profile image

      moonlake 12 months ago from America

      I now have Alexa I'm sure she listens to every word I say. I would call her a stalker.

      I also have a neighbor that doesn't realize I can hear her talking about me when I go outside. She's a stalker she watches me all the time I don't know why I'm the most boring person in the world.

      There is also a car that parks on the wrong side of the street with its lights on about twice a week he/she does this. I figured he was stealing wifi so as soon as I see him I turn off my wifi even though I have a password on it. My son also thought he might be doing this but he could be taking it from any of the houses near me. Just another stalker.

      Enjoyed your hub sadly there are people who are very dangerous stalkers.

    • RTalloni profile image

      RTalloni 12 months ago from the short journey

      Oh me...ads coming up from your conversation definitely is pause for thought! The world we live in reminds me of an old quote, "The mountains have ears."

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      Bev 12 months ago from Wales

      Thanks, Sakina. It's about time I got back into writing hubs!

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      Bev 12 months ago from Wales

      I have little bits of tape over both my laptop cameras, RTalloni - have done it for years. One thing that was quite disconcerting was talking to my partner about something or other - can't remember what it was now - and within an hour there were ads for that very thing appearing on my Facebook.

      Thanks for you kind words - first hub I've written in years.

    • SakinaNasir53 profile image

      Sakina Nasir 12 months ago from Kuwait

      Great hub Bev! It is so detailed and informative. I am sure people are going to find this very useful. Keep up the good work.☺

    • RTalloni profile image

      RTalloni 12 months ago from the short journey

      An insightful read with lots of important FIY info for oneself in case of need or for a relative or friend who may have a suspicious or serious situation. The times we live in do require an acceptance of a certain amount of surveillance activity but it's good to know something about what to do if it's out of the norm. I just heard a blip about the pope and Mark Zuckerberg both putting a bit of tape over the camera lenses on their computers. Hmmm...